giulia
HEAD-ROYCE SCHOOL
12TH GRADE
1.How do you identify? Have you always felt comfortable in this identity? Interpret this question however you'd like, whether it be your gender, ethnicity or nationality.
I have always been comfortable with my nationality. I always considered myself both Brazilian and American. Sometimes, however, I do feel isolated from the rest of my family in Brazil and from my classmates. I was made fun of in lower and middle school for acting Brazilian, and my family calls me and my sister “gringas”: the derogatory word for ‘foreigner’ in Portuguese (usually it is used to refer to Americans). I get the best of both worlds, but I also get the worst of both worlds. I was, and still am, a little unsure about my ethnicity. Some people say I am Latina, while others say I’m classified as Hispanic only. Lately, I have been leaning towards Latina.
2. Talk about the environments and communities you've been a part of and the ways in which they've affected the formation of your identity. Tell your story!
In 17 years, I have been to seven different schools thanks to my father’s work. From international independent schools to large public schools, I have been part of many communities. When I was three years old at a Montessori school in Florida, I got in trouble because of a Brazilian custom. There we greet people by hugging them, and I would hug everyone in my class. It felt nice! My teacher didn’t like it very much though. I was placed in the ‘time-out’ corner by the trashcan several times for it. She even yelled at my mom for not educating her daughter properly. Things were bad before that too. When I was two, my pediatrician at the time thought it was unusual that I wasn’t talking yet. I was processing two languages: Portuguese and English, and I could understand what was going on just like all the other kids my age, I just couldn’t talk yet. The doctor spoke to my mom as if I wasn’t in the room because of that, and I got so scared of the bad things she was saying about me that I hid under a chair. It was then that she began to think I was autistic, and told my mom to take me to a psychiatrist. She never did, because she knew that it wasn’t true. I did end up talking later on, starting out with complete sentences mixing portuguese and English.
My American identity made me stand out in Sao Paulo, where I went to a private catholic school. I sometimes translated to students who only spoke English, and vice versa. People seemed to like me for who I was, and I was never judged by my identity.
Then I went to a public school in Georgia, USA. People thought I was weird because I was used to greeting people with hugs and kisses on the cheek like in Brazil. They hated when I spoke Portuguese since they didn’t know what I was saying. I couldn’t help it! I was used to speaking both as a 7 year-old! I was also one of two Latinos in my class.
4th grade was interesting, as it was the first time I saw an entire community of Brazilians outside of Brazil. It was just like back in Brazil: I was admired for being whom I am instead of isolated.
Woodward Academy Middle School is where I began to share my culture and heritage. It was where I began to feel like I didn’t need to hide it anymore.
Here at HRS, I have been able to open up even more. I talk about Brazil all the time with my friends, and am never afraid that they will think I’m boasting or just being weird.
3.Where do you feel most safe as a racial minority at Head-Royce?
I feel the safe when I am with my friends and with people who recognize my identity like Dr. Bradley (a teacher at HRS).
4. In what moments, if any, have you felt hyper-aware of your race in attending an independent school?
I always feel super aware when I first go into a new school. I find myself trying to find Brazilians like me who I can empathize with, whether it be peers or faculty.
5. Do you feel as though individuals of your race are properly represented at HRS. Whether this is through the literature that we read, members of of our staff etc...
For Latinos: yes, but could see more in classes like math, science, and English. As for Brazilians: not that much, but more than previous institutions I have attended
6. If you came back to visit HRS in 10 years, what would you have liked to see changed?
I would like to see more Latinos than today, and more opportunities where students can express their heritage and culture.
7. Tell me about a time when you felt proud of your race!
When I was in China, I loved that there was a Brazilian community, and that I had people I could talk to in my other first language. When I watched an Olympic soccer game of Brazil vs. Germany, I jumped up and down every time they scored a goal and liked seeing the smiles on peoples’ faces when they tried Brazilian food at a school festival. I loved who I was as a Brasileira Americana(Brazilian American girl).